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The first ten minutes of your date will determine a lot, including if you will see this person again. And let’s face it, second dates aren’t that easy either. This is something our professional matchmakers teach our clients here at Orange County Singles Dating Service, and it’s a little thing called date waste.

A date waste is when a date goes on for too long with someone you know you’ll never see again. It drags out for too long because neither of you has set the date up to be successful. These are not the dates you go out on with jerks and hope it ends within minutes. These are the ones that are just plain old boring, the ones that lack that spark, the ones that never go anywhere. However, our matchmakers know we can help you turn these dates into very positive experiences as long as you’re willing to give what it takes.

In our 25 years of experience in the Orange County dating industry, we have seen date waste frequently. When singles accept dating for what it is and enjoy the journey rather than solely focusing on the end, dating will completely change for them. Every date is a possibility of learning something new as well as serving as a good way to practice. Each date gives you an opportunity to connect with someone you’ll want to get to know better, and maybe he will happen to be the one you fall in love with.

Today, our professional matchmakers will show you several things you can do to make your dates a positive experience and forever get rid of wasted dates that lead nowhere.

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1. Go to the Date with the Right State of Mind

Women usually approach first dates with the all too common attitude of “I hope he is into me.” But from now on, our matchmakers want you to do something different. We want you to approach dating with a different type of attitude. Now, you need to go out and make it about you and whether or not you like him. This will stop you from trying to read his mind and help focus on what really matters, which is how you feel with him.

2. Find a Few Things You Like about Him

Fight your bad habit of always being negative. Find reasons why he SHOULD be on your list rather than looking out for things to cross him off your list. It can be his cleanliness, his smile, his choice of date location, or even his fabulous social skills. Find whatever it is you like about him to keep him on your list.

3. Give Him a Compliment

Just remember that there is a chance that he is just as nervous as you are, and this is why our matchmakers want you to extend him a sincere compliment right in the beginning of the date. Doing so will start the date off on a positive note and help him loosen up. Besides, it’s a nice gesture, don’t you think?

4. Think of Dating as Practice

Every meeting with a man will bring you closer to finding Mr. Right. Of course from our experience in matchmaking we can tell you one thing, and that is that not every date you go out on is going to be successful. So what? Dating gives you a chance to learn more about dating, men, and even more about yourself. After each date you go out on, write down everything you have learned and apply it on your next date. See, it wasn’t that much of a waste after all, was it?

5. Let Go of Your Agenda

Don’t let your agenda ruin your first date because he doesn’t appear to be the man of your dreams. Just relax and have an open-mind for whatever comes your way. You never know, you just might let yourself relax and have a good time.

6. Have a Positive Aura about You

Our matchmakers want you to be positive and put your best foot forward by asking the right questions and avoiding negative talk. “My boss yelled at me today, and some jackass cut me off on the way here” is negative talk. How about “I’m so glad we were able to get together on such a beautiful day.”

7. Squash the Monsters

Everyone has them. The voices that tell us we’re never good enough or that we’re not worth it. When the voices come out in your head, tell yourself they’re wrong and that you are good and you do deserve love. Drown the monsters with positivity and you will be successful on your date.

8. It’s Okay to Let Go of Control

You’re there to get to know each other, not just talk about yourself. All that overthinking and overanalyzing will drain you on your date. Remind yourself that you cannot read his mind and that there are two people on a date here. Stop and pay attention to him. If you don’t, you could miss out on the possibility of dating the man of your dreams.

9. Be Kind with Him

Believe us when we tell you that he has fears and insecurities just like you. Don’t get all hung up on one thing he does wrong and cross him off completely because of it. Think about it and figure out if what he doing is truly a deal breaker for the relationship. If not, try to overlook it and continue having fun on your date.

Look at him with the eyes of a smart women working hard to find a good man. Regardless of how you judge him, our matchmakers want you to leave your date feeling good about himself, regardless of whether or not you will go out on another date with him. It’s the right thing to do, and you will boost his confidence for the next woman he goes out on a date with. Trust us, it’s good dating karma.

You are looking for a romantic partner you can spend the rest of your life with, someone you can share a deep connection with, a deep trust and forever love. Every date you go out on is a new possibility of hopefully meeting Mr. Right. And if you don’t happen to meet him, at least it’s a lesson learned, a lesson that will bring you closer to the one. So don’t think of your dates as wasted dates but valuable lessons in your quest of finding true love.

If you’re not meeting the right men on your own, contact our matchmakers at Orange County Singles Dating Service and let us introduce you to men who fit your specific dating criteria, compatible men who are also serious about dating and falling in love.

 

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